Listen to Your Writer.
(90) "Perhaps he understands more acutely the importance of love & the beauty of life itself, the inestimable potency of beauty within the tiny newness of his grandchild. Being a grandfather, I think Edmond Browning must have felt more acutely what is important and what is not. And what was most important would have been love-the severe desire for a child, not to succeed, but to fearlessly engage in a world in which love is so fearfully exchanged.
So then, if the Writer of our stories, or my story, views the world, views me in this way, how could I not trust this Author to pen the better story? Maybe we--or at least I--don't trust that the story will be better because what I care about most is success. And the world defines success as stuff or as comfort. And I define success by a sense that I have accomplished something great, or by the sense of importance I get from contributing to the good of others.
While it is a measure of love, the ways in which I contribute to the good of others, doing this to define myself is wrong. Acting with love for the sake of showering myself with pride, or to source my sense of worth and value is wrong.
I can only contribute. Whether it takes is not my business. I can only plant seeds with care and hope for the right growing conditions. If the seeds I have sown turn into some beautiful garden--it's not for me to stake my claim or say my hand had much to do with it at all.
What I would do well to try is to find my worth and value in the action of planting. No matter how it's done and no matter where I am. What I need to do is know that my worth and value are already defined by the Writer who is not me. What I need to know is that I too have been planted here, and right now I am given the conditions to grow in my life and through my love for it all.
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